This Saturday is the first in a new year and almost the end of my vacation. I wish I could rant and rave about all I accomplished while I was off, but not this time. My household was completely lazy. One child was sick after Christmas, one worked some and well I sat and thought and rested and thought some more. Sometimes that is a good thing and sometimes a huge detriment.
Now I did read some naughty and no deep thinking romance novels, watched movies with the kids, cooked a feast for new year’s day and well had my share of wine and then some. I did a few crafts and did get the Christmas decorations down and bombarded this blog with thoughts. So not totally a couch potato.
Now it is time to face the reality of going back to work. My daughter will head back to college and life will get crazy busy again. I love my job and have been more than blessed with my profession. It can also be mentally and emotionally exhausting. Sometimes it feels that you carry many responsibilities and the burden and hurt of others. Some days there isnt enough time in a day to meet all the demands. Then you have home demands to meet and self demands and relationships. Life can be alot. Life can be hard. But at the same token what a life we have been blessed with.
I have to remind myself that when I get overwhelmed and short on patience and time and money, that there is someone who would want my life (not sure who but there may be someone lol). We all have so much that we carry in life, and the load can vary. At the beginning of every year I try to re-evaluate life and what I need to do different. Not stay stressed so much, not work too much, be thankful more and complain less. Be a better woman, mom, daughter, sister, friend. By about March I am ready to run away from it all.
How about you? What in life do you love and what stresses you out? What do we need to do to have more peace in our life? There are alot of people out there that will tell is what we need and what we should do. If only we were more organized, more everything. Sometimes we can’t be everything and maybe that is the first realization.
This week has been like a coccon here. I have had less interaction with people, sometimes by circumstances and some just it is life. I have laid in bed instead of rushing out the door. I have given myself permission to take time off. Sure, there is alot of things I wish I had done or could have done, but sometimes doing nothing is required. We can get so bone weary, emotionally exhausted and spiritually depleted we need a reset button.
Now my reset button allowed me to overthink which isn’t a good thing. I know it has probably driven a couple of people crazy including myself. But I digress.
So how do we do this thing called life without depleting ourselves? How do we find that strength to push through and how do we keep that momentum going? And for every question I ask of you, well there is probably three that I ask myself. I don’t have all the answers–although I will guarantee that there have been people in my life who will tell you I think I have all the answers– but I have thoughts about what can help and maybe a plan on what to do.
These are just some thoughts I have been kicking around. They may not work for everyone and for some it may not make sense at all, but maybe it is a launch pad for further thoughts and future goals.
1. Spending time in prayer and reflection. Now I am not here to debate religion nor am I ashamed of mine. I am more than willing to share the gospel. Time spent reading a devotion, quiet moments that are just you and God, listening in the quiet for the direction you need.
2. Taking care of yourself. We as women seem to juggle alot and sometimes put others before ourselves. No offense to the men out there who do this, I just happen to be a woman and well I am looking through my rose colored glasses. Both men and women need to practice self care. Eating well and planning meals and good nutrition, some physical activity, getting good sleep. Taking a little slice of time for you. It doesn’t have to be extravagant. It can be giving yourself permission to read while the laundry is going versus another household chore; a bubble bath; a drive by yourself with the music you want to hear. Just take time to recharge your batteries. We give alot of ourselves to others, and well I wouldn’t choose anything differently. I like making others fell happy and loved and cared for, that is who I am. It makes me feel like I am bringing joy to someone else. Sometimes I go overboard and yes so want someone to return in kind but this is who I am.So we have to learn to take care of ourselves so that we don’t get depleted and take care of ourselves.
3. Laugh more and stress less. As adults we have to work, have adult responsibilities and bills to pay. So how do we manage it all without depleting ourselves more? I struggle with this one alot. I was raised to do your best possible at work. I suffer from being a people pleaser. I sometimes suffer from no one can do that but me. Yep, I just admitted a huge flaw. I worry about our patients and nurses under my care. Was I enough for the day? Was everyone taken care of? Then I come home and stress about being enough at home and to the people that I love. There is no easy answer for us here and I think it is individual. I think that we strive to do an honest day’s work and do our job to the best of our ability. To recognize that we each bring different gifts, talents and abilities to the table and we have to work as a team and recognize each person for what they do and also to recognize our role in their lives. That we just keep trying.
I am going to give myself permission to leave work at work when I clock out. I give myself permission to not stress that my house is cluttered and that I may not be perfect in all areas but applaud that I try. I am going to try to stress and worry less. This is a big one for me. I am a worrier. How about you?
4. Embrace who we are and those that love us. Maybe we spend more time interacting personally and less on social media. That we take the time for visits or phone calls. That we love on the people in our circle more.
I am guilty of mindless scrolling on social media. Posting silly memes, too many thoughts and catching up on friends and family that are far away and some that are close by. Think about it, we are like stalkers or private eyes that don’t get a paycheck. (Or I could be thinking this after watching season 2 of YOU). Social media is a double edged sword. I am more than thankful for how social media has brought someone into my life, catching up with family and friends. It can also be a pressure as well. Seeking approval and likes, followers and comments. Don’t get me wrong, this blog is part of social media and yes I want you to read it and like it and well like me too. Sometimes we do put alot of emphasis on our social media world. ‘Why can someone like her/his posts but not mine?’ ‘Look at how perfect their vacation was’ and the list and comments can go on. I think we need to give ourselves permission to not compare ourselves to others, that we just be real. When I post things it is because I found it funny or insightful or whatever emotion I feel. Or I post pictures of my kuds or my thoughts. There are people that see it and don’t comment or like it….well you little stalkers keep reading and watching. I post some pretty amazing thoughts. I am one of those that throws out likes and loves and comments like Oprah giving out cars! Social media is a part of life but not all there is to life. It is a double edged sword and you get to decide if you fall on your sword or wield it’s power. So I am going to be more mindful of the time spent on social media and work harder on the relationships in my life.
5. Be real for you. Life is hard and overwhelming. Don’t be anyone but yourself. Be silly, be naughty–safely mind you–be true to self. We all have many roles in life and sometimes the essence of who we are gets lost in the demands of our many roles. My nurse role is different than my mom role and the roles go on and each requires a different part if who I am and present in each role I/we participate in. Sometimes we have to reign in certain thoughts and words and actions depending on what we are doing. But who we are is the underlying theme. Be real, be yourself. I am flawed, feel too deeply, care too much, say silly things and the list goes on. But I am me and am real. Embrace every aspect of who you are. I am enough, you are enough. Start loving you. You are fearfully and wonderfully made.
6. Forget these lists. We all make lists in our lives. To do lists, grocery lists, pros and cons lists and the lists go on. Make the organization lists, do what you need to do. That is the point. We don’t have to follow a particular list of someone’s to do lists. Do your own. Maybe I listed my thoughts out and there are always a plethary of how to lists out there. Maybe mine is meant as reminders, a starting point of discovery and forgiveness. A reminder that I matter and you matter. That we have to care for ourselves before we can care for others. That we are given this one life and maybe we find a way to balance better. I want and need more balance in my life. How about you? More realness and less perfection, more embracing life and less running from life? I really don’t have all the answers and I have way too many thoughts. I just want to feel fulfilled and happy, love and to be loved, work hard and play more, figure out how to be happy in my own skin. Maybe each of you have similar thoughts and wants. Life is short, lists are long, love is wanted and needed, laughter required.
So on this Saturday, I will clean bathrooms and change sheets and declutter a bit. BUT I will be thankful for the chores, listen to music while I work and laugh when I can and not dread going back to work and the real world. I am blessed more than I deserve and thankful for the life I have. To the people in my life, you are my life and my loves and I am so thankful you love me.
