So a week of hearts and love and Valentine’s Day is on the horizon. It seems we just go from one holiday to the next. Each one making some feel they must buy a gift, some wishing that they would be remembered with a token or surprise and for some the holidays are lonely. What if we looked beyond Valentine’s Day?
So working in women’s health as long as I have and have seen and heard just about everything imaginable. I have seen where the outside picture of people looks perfect but there is so much hurt behind close doors. I have heard stories that break your heart with sadness, seen the bruises after physical abuse, heard the emotional cries of hurt and depression. The tragedies and hurt of intimate relationships. And yes there are the joys, the moments that make you clutch your pearls and think from scenes from The Notebook and happiness flows. Those seem to be not as often in our disposable society.
It makes one realize that in intimate relationships we don’t always care for the other one like they should. We all are striving to live and laugh and love. We want a relationship of safety and acceptance. Hallmark doesn’t always show the tough side of relationships or marriage. And we all get so caught up in a world of impressing others, wanting what others have, pick apart what we don’t have that we forget to value what we have. Or we get so caught up in the daily chores of life, we look at our partner as another responsibility versus a blessing.
Valentine’s Day is a big market to spend money. Roses elevated in price, chocolate galore, lingerie, dinners out you name it you can buy it. And it is so sweet to have love recognized on this day. But, what if we recognized love everyday? What if we surprised our loved ones with a surprise dinner, a card, their favorite candy or sitting outside with a glass of wine. Just time with no phones, no kids just a time for you.
Same goes for our friendships and family. We live in such a fast paced world, do we let those around us know what they mean to us and not just on a holiday? To go below the surface level. We live in a world of acquaintances with few true relationships. What if we really stopped complaining, stopped being so busy, stopped blaming others for actions, just stopped and stayed in a moment.
Love brought us here, love carries us here, love is a hope, a feeling, a need. Love weaves through our lives like a tiny gold thread. Sometimes it is so shiny and new. So bright with the promise of newness and togetherness. Then that gold fades and times can get challenging and commitments forgotten, promises broken and tarnished from tears. And then that gold takes on a worn, comfortable look showing healing and forgiveness and perseverance to keep that circle of thread weaving in our lives. Oh how the thread can bring people together, not a suffocating restraint but an embrace of a life spent in love. I guess it is just how we look at that common thread.
So as we celebrate another holiday (because they need to go ahead and get the Easter candy out) maybe we try and celebrate love everyday. Don’t get me wrong, does it feel amazing to be given a gift on a holiday and know you are thought of? Heck yes! Does it mean so much more to be given a card, a gift or something unexpected because you were on that person’s heart not associated with a holiday or because they feel like they have too. That is priceless.
I wanted to share a poem I wrote awhile back. We all have had hurts in our lives and we let everyday life drag us down and well maybe just a thought…….
Young love starts with dreams anew, first dates, holding hands
Love as soft as the new morning dew.
Life goes on and young love grows
Life gets hard, our hearts
become entangled.
Weeds can replace flowers faster than we know.
Love changes as time marches on
Children born, bills to pay
Working late into the night and coming dawn.
Passions change, bodies become slaves to life
Spilled milk, messy houses
Gone is quiet time of peace and life is full of strife.
Love continues to evolve if only fed
Children grow, priorities change
Sometimes our hearts go astray once led.
Love becomes constrained, love becomes a chore
Some lose that love and choose to walk out the door.
Oh where is the love that can make you heart sing?
Oh love return that can tie me up in a string.
Sorry love that we let life
overshadow your power
Come back to us and let us bask
in your shower.
Rain down on us a love that breathes
A love that is there
To taste, touch and feel
Above that makes the enemy seethe.
Oh love shine your face my way
To feel you, to sense you
To bask in amazement all day!
My apologies love for not extending
my tender loving care
Come back my way for my soul to bare.
Come back to me once again
I promise to you my life is on the mend.
No more weeds from this daily life.
Let your love chase away the strife.
To fill your love shine my way
will help us face life, come what may.
It just made me think we get so lost in the duties of life, we miss out on those precious moments. Maybe we can each be a bit kinder, a bit more thoughtful. Not only for those people in our lives but the people we love. So everybody get your hearts on (sorry couldn’t resist) and enjoy the day. Celebrate love, celebrate yourself, celebrate the trials and the hardships, just don’t stay stuck in the weeds when there is a whole field of wildflowers and possibilities.
