So here we are back to the grindstone of life. I know, some of you have been hard at work while I was resting on my laurels like the queen of Sheba. Well, bravo for all of us. We are adulting all the way to work and back. Look at us, we are navigating life. Who wants to navigate but have those moments of a mulligan, a re-do? Be it an action or words or a situation, just something we want to re-do? Who wants to just change the page and start writing a different story?
I am wanting to bring my most beloved chapters with me, editing the ones that I was a complete idiot. Yes, we all have those cringe worthy moments where we just can’t believe what happened. I have found myself in those instances of cringe worthy shagrin as well as the moments of just feeling the need to make things better, I say I am sorry.
Some days my name isn’t Stephanie but it is ‘Hello my name is sorry’. Don’t get me wrong, saying you are sorry is important. If you hurt or offend, to express condolences or sorrow, to empathize and not patronize. However, saying sorry for who we are and how we act and behave, well that has to stop. I am soooo guilty of this. I apologize when things aren’t my fault, I apologize for my actions or thoughts, not because either of these are a bad thing. It is almost like saying sorry excuses me of who I am.
I am sorry I text too much; I am sorry that I don’t look that great in the group picture; I am sorry to feel the way I feel or laugh when I shouldn’t; I am sorry I self depricate before you have a chance to put me down. It is a defense mechanism. Before someone can hurt you, you hurt yourself with negative thoughts and scenarios; you assume someone is thinking the worst of who you are when in reality they could give two flying ducks (haha–you see I typed the PG version and you inserted the R version). Do you say I am sorry repeatedly or are you like the character from a sitcom from long ago that could only say the “S”sound and not the word? Or are you of stronger fortitude and only use the word in the correct connotation? Well bravo my friend! You are a step ahead on this journey and your usage of this one little phrase.
For those of us who struggle to see ourselves in a more positive light, let’s follow their lead. No more apologizing for who we are and what we think or feel. We need to recognize that we matter and it is ok if we aren’t perfect. It is ok to say sorry at the appropriate junctures of life BUT it is time we discard over apologizing. I know I need to. It has become a habit. Apologizing when it is not my fault or not my misunderstanding. My ex-in-laws always told me I must have misunderstood what they said, and that wasn’talways the case. These is a tactic used to manipulate someone. It has taken me awhile to figure that out. And old habits die hard. So how about I work harder with the intention of stopping excessive apologizing. What do you want to intend for a change? How do we reach this goal?
Well, I think we stop the self-deprecating behavior. That we say sorry when required but not apologize for who we are. Maybe, just maybe we realize our worth. That we realize that everyone that crosses our pathway may not like us and that is okay. They can’t help that they don’t have good taste to be present in our awesome space. It is ok to not please everyone or carry the baggage like a pack mule. It is ok to not apologize for who we are, how we look or think. Maybe it is ok to embrace ourselves. Now we need to apologize when warranted and do our best to not inflict hurt or trauma to others. Maybe we give ourselves that same permission to not hurt ourselves with the thoughts and words we use against ourselves? Stop criticizing ourselves for how we look, act, feel, how we just try our best. Let’s be the woman or man that we were born to be. To stand tall and secure in the perfectly flawed person we are, to celebrate that we are us, and no apologies for the person we are and aretm trying to become. Let your light shine and less ‘I am sorry’ statenents Let that inner goddess have a bit more free reign and no more excessive apologies! Let’s start this intention now for our own mental well-being.
This quote was found on Pintrest and I do not own any rights to this.